Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Spring has sprung.

It's spring down here in the south. You know that whole March going in like a lion thing? Well, when I lived near Chicago, it was pretty much a lion all month long. A cold, rainy, not very cute lion. Not here in the land of peaches. It's 75 degrees today. Perfect. I'm enjoying my first spring in the south by having a mojito. You may notice the time stamp. It's noon. It's happy hour, somewhere, right?

Amazing how the weather can have such a profound impact on your mood. Alan and I spent the weekend mulching and planting flowers. I planted my first flowers ever. Around my mailbox. Yeah, we live in suburbia. Get over it. It felt so good to be outside, doing active things. At the risk of sounding cheesy, I just felt really alive. See, I missed all the good weather last year. Spring and Summer and Fall came and went. I couldn't be outside in the sun and I felt like shit. Way to live, huh? This spring I vow it will be different. If I have to live in a land where people think evolution's only a theory, at least I can enjoy the sunshine.

I think about spring a lot right now. For SATC fans (Sex and the City, for those of you not in-the-know), you may recall when Samantha got breast cancer. Some have told me, that of all the Sex and the City characters, I remind them most of her. I choose to believe it's for her spunk, her loyalty and her no-nonsense approach to most problems - not just because she's a dirty whore. See, Samantha's identity was very much tied up with her sexuality. She was dating this HO-OT man about 15 years younger who turned out to be the greatest guy ever. Anyway, when she was going through chemo and menopause and lost her sex drive and didn't feel like herself, her boyfriend told her it was like winter. It may look and feel dead, but it's just waiting for spring. He then proceeded to send her daffodil bulbs with a card that said, "looking forward to spring." You know by the end she got back her mojo and fucked the shit out of him. Good girl.

I guess that's how I feel. That most of me has felt dead and gone the past year, but it's just a matter of letting it bloom again. Not just sex, but me- all the things that make me feel myself. Maybe that's the reason for the mid-life crisis dancing, diving, buying or photo taking. I feel like it's time to peel away all the dead bark, rake up all the nasty leaves, and pulls some weeds. Prune some of those insecurities and repot some self-confidence. Aerate some fun. Put down some fertilizer and water daily. Watch for the gorgeous blooms that have been hiding all winter. Those blooms of fearlessness and sex and humor and mojo. Look at them one sunny day and remind yourself just how fabulous they are and how wonderful you are for cultivating them.

I'm looking forward to spring.


Anonymous said...

I'll put down some fertilizer baby...

Anonymous said...

Samantha would say your personal approach to spring is fabulous. Enjoy your mojitos and your flowers!AJ

Melissa said...

You hit it on the nose. This is exactly how I feel. I'm wishing the world would return to normal, but returning to just spring would be a major victory.

Jayne said...

I'm just a bit north of you (NC) where March is all-about-college-basketball.

Love the flowers!