Friday, February 16, 2007

Post-treatment mid-life crisis, chapter 4



Remember when I talked about my mid-life crisis? My desire to do any and all things ridiculous? That involved buying silly cars, adopting dogs, trapeze swinging, pole dancing... general craziness. I took suggestions and that was when it occurred to me that I needed to jump out of an airplane. I told Alan of my desire to skydive. What says, "I already did cancer and this can't be nearly as bad" as much as jumping from miles above the earth's surface?

Alan, the smart boy that he is, remembered such declaration and surprised me last weekend with an adventure for us. For Valentine's Day, he said. Because nothing says "I love you" like jumping together to your death.

So off we went. Unfortunately, we picked a pretty cold day down here in the South for it. I would guess it was below zero at altitude. We were jumping tandem with an instructor, so I wasn't too worried. I went first. Off to 14,000 feet I went. While I was nervous, the fact that some other jumpers were putting together a Mister Potato Head while falling through the sky made me relax. How hard can it be? I wasn't quite sure what falling at 120 miles an hour would feel like.




The scariest part? Right before the jump. I had to put my feet over the edge of the plane and count to three. Thankfully, I was attached to someone who was actually going to jump on three, so I was going no matter what. One- two-

THREEEEEEEE-

Off we went. We fell upside down for a second and righted ourselves. I have to say, once that first second went by, the fear was gone. Probably "terminal velocity" shenanigans... - yeah, I took high school physics. I had no idea that it would feel like such a long time up there. I felt like we Had forever. Time to pose for the camera guy, grab hands and spin in a few circles, My ears felt like they might fall off and my cheeks were pushed up to my forehead, but it was great.

Awesome. Totally awesome.


Notice Alan has the "rock quotes."



There wasn't a cloud in the sky and we could see everything. After a free fall for about 8,000 feet, we pulled the parachute. A bit of a yank and it opened. Then I heard my instructor say, "oh shit." Oh, shit, you say? I can't imagine "oh shit" is a good thing. Turns out, a part of our chute was still wrapped up in itself a bit. After a couple more shits and some tugging, all was right with the world. Again, I was struck with how long you had up there. Time to play, time to fix things, thing to just sit back and have some fun. Me, I just enjoyed the ride. We sailed along in the parachute for a while, making circles and turns. My instructor announced, "Welcome to my office." You know he says that line every time. Just as I used to make the same jokes at bingo.

After a fun parachute ride, we landed gracefully on our feet.



And I was hooked. I will be going back. One of my best ideas ever. I am now taking suggestions for the next challenge.

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Washington Cancer Institute at Washington Hospital Center Presents:
Living Well with Cancer



CANCER: The Job You Got - But Didn’t Apply For©
A Program for Cancer Survivors, Family, Friends and Caregivers

You got the job. You have cancer. You wish that you could just say “No thank you,” but that’s not an option. You have it and now you’ve got to run with it. The stakes are very high. You want this to go well and you really want to succeed. In order to do so you have to be a good manager and an advocate. You are the boss. You even have a staff. They are doctors, nurses, family, friends and many others. How do you manage them and empower yourself to succeed at living well with cancer?



The professional staff of the Washington Cancer Institute will introduce you to new way of thinking about cancer that can help you take control of its physical, emotional and spiritual demands.



Program:

8:30-9:00 a.m. Continental Breakfast

9:00-10:00 Managing the Job

Cynthia Clark, RD, LD
Oncology Nutrition Specialist

Kate Rollins
Oncology Nurse Specialist

Fatigue. Pain. Constipation. Loss of Appetite. You will likely have to deal with one or more of these issues in this job. Our speakers will introduce you to the idea of shared decision-making -- a way of thinking that will empower you to ask for – and get – what you need to manage and control symptoms from cancer or as a result of treatment. Kate and Cindy leave no stone unturned in this frank talk, but they will leave plenty of time for questions and discussion.


10:00-10:30 Questions & Discussion

10:30-10:45 Break

10:45-11:30 Tending the Spirit
Danetta Hendricks, MA
Social Work/Counseling

Cancer is an assault on body, mind and spirit. While you’re busy managing cancer’s physical effects, how do you find the energy to uncover its spiritual meaning? Danetta’s primary responsibility is counseling patients at Washington Cancer Institute on the many aspects and challenges of living with cancer. She is also a Reiki One practitioner and massage therapist and for our program, she will describe and demonstrate techniques and self-help tools used for meditation and relaxation that can help you access the spiritual energy residing within you.

Two Dates and Two Convenient Locations

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Directions: http://www.cherryhillpark.com/index.cfm?action=home.maps

May 19 at our D.C. program in the auditorium of the National Rehabilitation Hospital (NRH) on the campus of the Washington Hospital Center.
Directions: http://www.nrhrehab.org/Patient+and+Visitor+Information/Directions+to+NRH/default.aspx

These programs are free; however space is limited.

Please RSVP to (202) 877-DOCS (3627) or online at http://whcenter.org/body.cfm?id=556334

Anonymous said...

You f*@k'n rock! I love the new hair too!

I would say how brave you are but we all know that you're just totally insane. And that's why we love you.

I think your next adventure should be hot air ballooning all the way to LA. I'll even treat you to dinner when you get here.

Much love to you and your boobies!

David J. Hahn said...

I think cancer broke the part in your brain that made you terrified of terrifying things.

Also, congratulations: you are now straight out of a Tim McGraw song. You now need to go Rocky Mountain climbing and 2.7 seconds on a bull named fumanchu. Good luck.